In a surge of nostalgia, I've been writing up a plot summary for my old Starshine Weyr (a Pern fandom, where you roleplay original characters in that world) storylines. For some idea of the timeline, the first scenes were in 1997 and I think it started petering out in 2001.
There's a lot that's rough around the edges, soap opera quality and sometimes just embarrassing - but I was young. (I also realize that I spent way too much time roleplaying with myself and making other people watch, a tendency which I think I've (mostly) grown out of.) Still, that notwithstanding, the depth, complexity and yeah, insanity of events leaves me boggled.
In some ways, my plots are stronger while playing with others, helped by the kind of extended time and thought this entails. In others ... sometimes I worry I've put on filters that - while they've made my writing more mature - has also taken some of the zing out of it.
In general, I get really gnawy with the worry that I can't come up with things as developed when I'm doing it on my own. Is this true? Is it nonsense? I don't know ...